When you’ve been emotionally abused, thrown off the pedestal, criticized, blamed, shamed and made to feel that you’re less than, you need time to gather the shattered pieces of your life.
Be gentle with yourself.
You are grieving.
Often this grief starts long before the relationship ends, when you realise that nothing is real.
When you realise that you’ve been brainwashed to feel, think and behave the way the toxic person wanted you to.
As time passes you also realise that you are grieving the loss of yourself, because you have twisted yourself like a pretzel to be what they wanted you to be, and silenced yourself to make walking on eggshells easier.
But time passes and you begin to wake up.
And that’s the hard part.
Because not only do you see what you have become but what is not and what never will be
There’s the you inside that you will never ever lose.
The you, who with passing time, appears through the cracks.
You realise all that you used to be, and all that you could be.
And with the passing of days, the clouds slowly roll back and you suddenly find yourself belly laughing in your friend’s kitchen to nothing in particular
And you know somehow, that you’ll get there.
Take Good Care
Jacqueline Groves is a Psychotherapist and Coach specializing in emotional abuse recovery from toxic relationships.